HEY SIMON COWELL, PISS OFF WITH YOUR DJS So a bunch of turntablists are presumably up-in-arms about Simon Cowell buying into their subculture. He’s announced that he’s going to be launching an X Factor type of thing, but for DJs. I mean, how long is it going to be before he’s macking onto the other four disciplines of hip-hop: graffiti, rap, breakdancing and shoes? Will Smith and his weird emo wife are also involved in the deal. And so, you must imagine, are the people who nearly expired from cringe as Simon Cowell shuffled up to them at a party and explained that he could see a big future in rap music, now that Cher Lloyd had broken down the barriers (and we must be talking rap and hip-hop here, unless Cowell’s planning to entrance the nation’s housewives with an hour-long extravaganza of deep house every Saturday night). But hey! DJs, don’t just sit there crying onto your decks! I know you’re upset that the mainstream is trying to co-opt your artform, but now is not the time to go down quietly! Pack up your Michael Viner’s Incredible Bongo Band records, turn your cap to rap-o’clock, sharpen your needles, polish your vinyl and go and throw all that stuff off a bridge. Then, instead of being a pompous embarrassment, read this article VICE wrote long before you were born about WHY DJING IS CRAP. Read the full article here

HEY SIMON COWELL, PISS OFF WITH YOUR DJS

So a bunch of turntablists are presumably up-in-arms about Simon Cowell buying into their subculture. He’s announced that he’s going to be launching an X Factor type of thing, but for DJs. I mean, how long is it going to be before he’s macking onto the other four disciplines of hip-hop: graffiti, rap, breakdancing and shoes?

Will Smith and his weird emo wife are also involved in the deal. And so, you must imagine, are the people who nearly expired from cringe as Simon Cowell shuffled up to them at a party and explained that he could see a big future in rap music, now that Cher Lloyd had broken down the barriers (and we must be talking rap and hip-hop here, unless Cowell’s planning to entrance the nation’s housewives with an hour-long extravaganza of deep house every Saturday night).

But hey! DJs, don’t just sit there crying onto your decks! I know you’re upset that the mainstream is trying to co-opt your artform, but now is not the time to go down quietly! Pack up your Michael Viner’s Incredible Bongo Band records, turn your cap to rap-o’clock, sharpen your needles, polish your vinyl and go and throw all that stuff off a bridge. Then, instead of being a pompous embarrassment, read this article VICE wrote long before you were born about WHY DJING IS CRAP.

Read the full article here

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AN OBLIGATORY AND POINTLESS DEBATE ABOUT THE X FACTOR Every hack we know is scoring easy coin forcing themselves into a clear (yet controversial) position on either side of the argument, appealing to your overactive senses of indignation and pointless fury in the process. So we created two journalists out of thin air to wrap the warm blanket of self-righteousness around you and whisper in your ear: “It’s okay, baby – it’s the world that’s wrong.”

AN OBLIGATORY AND POINTLESS DEBATE ABOUT THE X FACTOR

Every hack we know is scoring easy coin forcing themselves into a clear (yet controversial) position on either side of the argument, appealing to your overactive senses of indignation and pointless fury in the process. So we created two journalists out of thin air to wrap the warm blanket of self-righteousness around you and whisper in your ear: “It’s okay, baby – it’s the world that’s wrong.”

Posted |